We all have those friends we see every day. They go to class with us, work with us. They eat meals with us and hang out when there is spare time. They buy groceries with you and want to see the same movies. They are the ones who deal with all of your complaining and forgive you for your misgivings. It's an endless cycle of giving and taking, and yet, I have found that my list of friends has come short. I remember spending time all summer with everyone: going to parties, making food, playing video games, sleepovers, etc. I remember the first week back to school when we all partied and had homework parties. I remember the plays and the gossip. I remember meeting someone very special to me. I remember spending less time with everyone. I remember everyone not calling me to do things anymore.

I especially remember all of the awkward moments people created to make one person or another feel awkward for one reason or the other. I remember all of the truly hurtful things everyone said to everyone else. I remember the alliances. I remember the talks and the pizza. I remember the tears and the smiles. I remember it all.

I just can't remember when we decided to all stop being friends. We've all grown apart very quickly. It has surprised me very much. I loved spending time with everyone, but I just feel that now I'm not at liberty to do so. There are people I can't be around and people I can't wait to see again. I just wanted everything to be different. Going into my senior year in college, I have found that many of the close friends I made in the beginning are no longer my friends anymore. I realize that I'm in a different place now than I was in before. I'm in a new relationship (that makes me tremendously happy). I have made new friends. I have managed to get my life back in order. I party a lot less.

I'm not sure if the changes in my life are totally for the good or not. I just know that I have the summer and next semester to try and do some repairing or complete the tearing.

It's beena  very hard year for me. I've struggled with many obstacles presented to me. My next biggest obstacle is two months in Rennes, France with only one real friend nearby. Wish me luck!

Usually when I go out with my Client, we go to McDonald's. She plays in the Playplace with the other children, making new friends. We sometimes take coloring books into the student union and color for a few hours. There are even times we just watch television and dance around her living room. Once, we spent four hours in the library playing with the blocks and Legos, momentarily working through a children's computer game. This past Sunday, however, I had the opportunity to go to the circus.

Just to be frank, I hate the circus for a few reasons:
1) I hate the smell of the animals.
2) Large animals make me nervous.
3) I think making bears walk on their hind feet is cruel.
4) I lack the imagination I had when I was a child that allowed me to appreciate acrobatic feats.
5) They rob you of every penny you have.

I arrived at the Fargodome with my client. We entered the stadium and went to find some food. After getting our snacks, we headed into the actual seating area and found a seat high enough to see everything clearly. We sat and waited for a long time for the show to start. When the lights finally dimmed, they did the usual thanking and acknowledging. They had us stand for the national anthem... That's when I started to get choked up. I thought to myself: "You're so silly. How are you choked up over this?" We sat down, and they started the show proper. I watched the first half of the circus as if I was a child again. I was amazed at the acrobats and the bears. I gasped as the magicians performed these simple tricks and quick-changes. I was teary-eyed for over an hour and all because I hadn't been to the circus since I was ten or twelve.

Have you had an experience like mine? One that made you feel like a kid again?

I've been reading a lot lately about liberating experiences that my close friends have been having. I just recently had one of my own. I feel like a different person, a new one. I feel like it really hasn't hit me how significant this event is in the grand picture of my entire life. I haven't yet realized the positive repercussions of the event fully. I'm close to having it hit me. I'm so close to realizing what has really happened.

I feel so happy. I feel so wonderful.

What has been your most liberating experience and why?

I just posted about this Nine Inch Nails/Jane's Addiction tour for 250 credits. You can earn free credits too!

I realized today that sometimes the only things we have to say aren't necessarily the things we need to say.

I'm tired of the games. I'm tired of the hoops. I'm tired of having to listen and patrol all of the time.

I just posted this BENADRYL® Pollen Alert widget for 250 credits. You can earn free credits too!

I just posted this Gerber I Pledge widget for 250 credits. You can earn free credits too!

10 below.

In regards to the sadness one feels when leaving Minnesota in February, I feel none. The unfortunate discovery of snow as I left my house this morning to attend the last classes before break was disconcerting. Once I reached the campus, the bell-tower loomed overhead. As the bell tolled the time, I hurried off to class with anxious and excited thoughts of tour.

As my classes wound down, I began the process of last-minute packing and re-packing that allowed for me to remember everything I forgot to pack the first time around. The Concordia Choir once again embarks on its annual choir tour. This time, the choir ventures west to Seattle, Tacoma, Portland, and Vancouver. After a few days more of enduring the cold of the north, we will hop onto a plane for warmer climes: Hawaii. This comes later...

After a short rehearsal, the choir had dinner and loaded up on buses headed for Minneapolis. The plan is to fly from Minneapolis to Seattle tomorrow morning before an evening concert at First Presbyterian Church in Seattle. Tonight, though, the choir has settled in for the night, dreaming dreams of clear waters and sandy beaches. Aloha, Tour!

 

I'm a twenty-one year old college student with "plans" for the future and a lot of living to do. I'm double-majoring in two partially-related fields. I'm digging myself out of a large mound of debt (colorful debt with sprinkles and weird smells). I'm working several jobs, attending classes, and trying to maintain some semblance of a personal life. With all of that living I'm doing, I wonder what life really is.

I have motivated myself through broken relationships and fallen spirit. I struggle daily with my concept of God and spirituality. I wake up each morning just wanting to keep sleeping or to just enjoy the day. I just wish for a day when I can call in sick to work and just spend time with the people I love.

My small taste of living has come in an odd but very familiar form, something I've mentioned a lot these days. I am in love with an amazing person who is both caring and compassionate. He is giving and thoughtful, honest and very intelligent. It's amazing how, in such a short time, a person can become part of the foundation of one's life.

I'm finally living life, some new type of life... a happy life. I'm excited to see where this path takes me.